Last week I told you that you needed to go and buy the shit out of everything. And instead, we are now in a recession. Those eight Wal-Mart employees got trampled to death for nothing.
So that is another thing that I should bring up. Why the hell did you people kill those Wal-Mart employees? In Rhode Island, there were all of these fat bitches lining up in front of the Wal-Mart at 4 in the morning. And Cletus the security guard was behind the door. And all of those fat bitches were lining up to save 40 cents on a roll of made-in-China lead-filled toilet paper. So they broke the door and trampled the security guard.
Cletus the security guard died. And all those shoppers saved money, and then they walked all over him on the way out.
But now the family of Cletus the security guard will sue Wal-Mart for $5 million and this will be the best Christmas they ever had. They will always remember him because they will put his picture on top of their new 52" high definition plasma television. You know, I hope that they get their settlement paid in Wal-Mart merchandise.
And who the hell are all of these useless people that are so desperate as to line up in front of Wal-Mart? If we blew up the Wal-Mart, nobody would notice. And they wouldn't leave anything behind either. So Wal-Mart has come out with a new solution: in the city where I live, two of the Wal-Marts are open 24/7.
It's like we can't have enough cheap plastic shit that will end up in the dump within a week. And why the hell is that? It's because I told you that you needed to go and buy the shit out of everything. I should have clairified. You should go and buy the shit out of everything that is not on sale.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
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3 comments:
We have been in a recession since October of 2007. It has only been "officially" admitted to. That's point 1. The second point is that this is a government engineered recession. "We" don't suck. The government does. Learn a bit about the government, the policies and the things that went into affect before you open your mouth. How about that?
Seems people want to find someone to blame, but to me it's just ugly human greed.
The amount of money people spend on presents during the Holidays is stupefying. You buy shit for people who can offord it, then open it and return it to buy whatever they want.I call Bullshit! Nowadays holidays are about impressing people you don't like by buying them things they don't need with the money you don't have. Fuck it. stop buying like an automaton. Use your head.
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